Sunday, June 18, 2006
Deodorant ManFather's Day is never as big as Mother's Day, and I wonder why. Most of the dads don't seem to understand either. InteractiveDadMagazine conducted an online survey of 400 men and found that four out of five believe Father's Day is just as important a celebration as Mother's Day. But that's like asking dogs if they want lots of Cheez-It; the answer is always yes, and you don't need a poll to know.
The email advertisements I get certainly confirm my thinking. Albertson's supermarket has a steak sale, Circuit City is offering 15% off on camcorders and digital cameras, and Costco has specials on golf bags and Norelco electric shavers. But overall, not the commercial frenzy you get for Mom's Day. And that's not surprising. I read that according to the National Retail Federation, stores predict that consumers will spend only $9 billion on Dad, compared to the nearly $14 billion they lavished on Mom. And AT&T said that like Mother's Day, Father's Day is also one of their busiest days, except that many more calls made today will be collect calls. Probably the "Dad, can you come bail me out of jail? Don't tell Mom" type.
This week two events finally made me understand why. First, the birds are back. As I wrote last year, there is a family of bluebirds that have adopted my home as their home sweet nest. That, despite the dogs constantly trying to make the birds their special catch of the day. The birds have built a small nest in a planter hung under the gazebo, about eight feet off the ground. The plant and flowers must be providing shade and respite from the hot sun for the birds, and the chirping sounds give plenty of entertainment for the huskies who want to be like birds and fly up to snatch away the little ones. I forgot to mention the chick babies, maybe three or four but they make more noise than the entire Tom Cruise fanboy club, either crying for food or just intentionally driving the already nutty dogs more insane.
The point of the story here, though, is that while Mom Bird spends day and night in the nest, fixing it up with more branches and leaves, and feeding the babies and protecting them from monsters below, Dad is simply and utterly useless. He flies around from one tree to another, once in a while swooping down close enough to the grass to tease the canines, but mostly he stands at the top of the gazebo scanning the landscape, trying to look macho and manly. If he had a flat screen TV, I bet he'd have the World Cup on right now.
The second event happened at the supermarket yesterday. I noticed that Mitchum anti-perspirant and deodorant sticks now come with a new label on the cap, that says: "If the hardware store is your idea of shopping, you're a Mitchum man." Not exactly the stuff of Socrates, but that slogan does sum up the essence of man quite nicely. No need for flowers, fancy dinners and collect calls. What makes man happy is Home Depot and a deodorant stick, and freedom to go around and bother the dogs.
- posted by Woofwoof @ 6:02 AM
Comments:
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We don't make a big deal of Father's Day here, but my husband doesn't appear to mind. Maybe all he wants is that deodorant. I should try that this year.
# posted by 
: 18 June, 2006 10:33
: 18 June, 2006 10:33
Does the Mitchum really say that? I better go look. Ive heard about the AquaVelva man, but Mitchum man?
# posted by : 18 June, 2006 13:31
: 18 June, 2006 13:31
In Brazil Father's Day is on the second Sunday of August, but it is the same here. Mother's Day is just supassed in sales by Xmas here. I think that the bird story explains that quite well... Mums are always there and usually it is a closer relationship with them.
Connecticut,
Well, how did that go? Divorce yet, or just separation trial? I take no responsibility for ideas mentioned in this blog.
Anonymous,
Yes, it really does say that. It must be a new thing though.
John,
But that's just the sexist attitude. We should send you to sensitivity training.
Raisa,
I think that's very true. The Mom bird is still there, and this is the 3rd week. Dad is out drinking with the guys.
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Well, how did that go? Divorce yet, or just separation trial? I take no responsibility for ideas mentioned in this blog.
Anonymous,
Yes, it really does say that. It must be a new thing though.
John,
But that's just the sexist attitude. We should send you to sensitivity training.
Raisa,
I think that's very true. The Mom bird is still there, and this is the 3rd week. Dad is out drinking with the guys.
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