Saturday, May 06, 2006
I need a ginsu knifeI woke up this morning with a horrific headache, made myself a cup of coffee and crawled back to bed. It all started yesterday. I was at work talking with a couple of people when suddenly this nauseated feeling hit me like a 5-ton truck. For a brief second I thought I was going to hurl right then and there but fortunately I was able to hold it down. I am sure the two guys are still wondering if they said something that got me so upset. All day today I've stayed mostly in bed, except for brief trips to the bathroom to gulp down handfuls of Tylenols. It is a real shame to feel like a hangover when you haven't touched a six-pack of Ozeki sake in a while.
But this story is really not about the headache, but about the wonder of daytime television. Not soap operas or game shows, or Jerry Springer episodes about mothers who share teenage boyfrtends with their daughters, but the amazing stuff you can buy while just laying in bed. They had an infomercial today about a Flavor-Wave DeluxeTM oven which uses a halogen lamp to supposedly cook better and up to 50% faster than a conventional oven. The claim is that this is a revolutionary technique that combines conduction, convection and infrared cooking. The halogen light lets you drive heat uniformly all the way to the center of the food, from french fries to small steaks or large birds. And unlike microwave ovens, the process doesn’t burn or dry out the outer layer before it cooks it. They had cooking demos of pizzas, broiled lobsters, pork ribs, and Thanksgiving turkeys. This thing was really the all-in-one miracle cooker.
And that's not all! With purchase of the Flavor-Wave Deluxe you get free a "Le Presse" food cutting tool which dices, slices, juices, chops, cores apples, and makes baby food! Turns cabbage into coleslaw or potatoes into french fries. Makes crabcakes, burgers, and even gourment sausage. They say that these are tools used by 5-star restaurants around the world! And you can have it right in your home for only 4 payments -- no, wait, only 3 payments of $33 plus shipping and handling if you order today.
If I don't feel better by tomorrow, I think I am going to order a brand-new kitchen.
- posted by Woofwoof @ 7:43 PM
Comments:
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Don't fall for it. I bought the Ronco "Set It and Forget It" Rotisserie thing. It cooks OK but not quite as evenly as I would like, and it's a pain to clean.
By the way, that Ozeki sake is nasty stuff. I use it to disinfect the toilet bowl.
By the way, that Ozeki sake is nasty stuff. I use it to disinfect the toilet bowl.
# posted by 
: 07 May, 2006 12:05
: 07 May, 2006 12:05
Connecticut,
Like many things and people, the Ronco looks better on TV than in real life.
As far as Ozeki goes, "disinfecting the toilet" and "drinking" to us are very similar concepts. Same end goal.
Heather,
And I need them to leave me alone. Their therapeutic value is vastly overrated :)
John,
It's always been the same principle: Meat + heat = food. All they do is twist it a bit to make a buck.
Like many things and people, the Ronco looks better on TV than in real life.
As far as Ozeki goes, "disinfecting the toilet" and "drinking" to us are very similar concepts. Same end goal.
Heather,
And I need them to leave me alone. Their therapeutic value is vastly overrated :)
John,
It's always been the same principle: Meat + heat = food. All they do is twist it a bit to make a buck.
I like my Ronco. I agree it doesn't cook big turkeys well, but it does the smaller rotisserie chicken perfectly, I think. Yeah it's hard to clean if you are into that kind of thing.
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# posted by : 14 May, 2006 13:30
: 14 May, 2006 13:30<< Home
